Most of the thoughts that I deem blogworthy are born out of long involved conversations I have with one my closest friends via telephone. Today we had a discussion concerning relationships and their relevance during various seasons of life.
I told myself that I would avoid bringing up Barbara Kingsolver again in my blog, simply because I didn't want to appear to be an overly devoted fiend. But, she makes some really great points in her books.
I am particularly fond of the concepts in Kingsolver's book (A.V.M) concerning the irrelevance of seasons in the American culture in terms of food consumption. Her book focuses on eating only locally produced food and those who choose to do this, "locavores". But that isn't the idea that struck me.
The concept that struck me is that it seems that part of being an American is being shown how to expect to be able to procure whatever we deem necessary at any time. It starts with goods such as tomatoes in December (even though most of them are not that delicious) and moves toward such imports as the Tahitian vanilla in my pantry. Side note: I am not a locavore, I am more of a fancy imported food whore. Just being honest here.
But I think this mentality has also spread itself into our lack of respect for seasons in most things. Teenagers seem to be a common indicator of the direction our culture takes since they tend to charactature the good and bad so poignantly. And who expresses more feeling of entitlement than teenagers? Ok, more than celebrities? Ok, more than celebrity teenagers?
Anyway, you can google teenagers and their feelings of entitlement and you'll get quite the response since this seems to be on most people's minds as they struggle to understand it's source. I am sure there is also a term used to define our current crop of teenagers and their respective generation with some kind of letter, like Generation A or Generation B. I'll go with Generation Give Me What I Want or I'll Sic Social Services On You. But, my point here is that it isn't too difficult to figure out why our youth are so impatient and expect privilege without responsibility or hard work.
It seems to me that the American Dream has been perverted into the American Fantasy. Less accountability, more belongings, more pleasure and yes... more entitlement.
So, how does this apply to relationships? How realistic are most people's expectations of their spouses or their marriages? How tolerant are we really when it comes to the seasons of our lives and how they interact with those of our loved ones?
The reality is that the divorce rate is ridiculous and people are terrified of marriage because their expectations are unrealistic. I think that if eyes were set on reality, the expectations wouldn't kick us in the butt. Recognizing how little we really are entitled to, how much we need to really work for what we want, and how much it really is worth it, starts with granting nature its rights to run its course.
Trying to get our relationships to spontaneously bring forth the products (produce) we think during the wrong season of life and then resenting it for not being unnaturally accommodating to our unrealistic expectations is pretty fruitless (Warning: Metaphor Overkill Now In Progress).
Needless to say, I feel that there is a time and season for all things, not just tomatoes. After all, how can we truly appreciate the sweetness this life has during seasons of plenty if we haven't accepted the bitterness of going without during seasons of drought? Now, where did I put that vanilla? I want to make some exotic cupcakes.
I told myself that I would avoid bringing up Barbara Kingsolver again in my blog, simply because I didn't want to appear to be an overly devoted fiend. But, she makes some really great points in her books.
I am particularly fond of the concepts in Kingsolver's book (A.V.M) concerning the irrelevance of seasons in the American culture in terms of food consumption. Her book focuses on eating only locally produced food and those who choose to do this, "locavores". But that isn't the idea that struck me.
The concept that struck me is that it seems that part of being an American is being shown how to expect to be able to procure whatever we deem necessary at any time. It starts with goods such as tomatoes in December (even though most of them are not that delicious) and moves toward such imports as the Tahitian vanilla in my pantry. Side note: I am not a locavore, I am more of a fancy imported food whore. Just being honest here.
But I think this mentality has also spread itself into our lack of respect for seasons in most things. Teenagers seem to be a common indicator of the direction our culture takes since they tend to charactature the good and bad so poignantly. And who expresses more feeling of entitlement than teenagers? Ok, more than celebrities? Ok, more than celebrity teenagers?
Anyway, you can google teenagers and their feelings of entitlement and you'll get quite the response since this seems to be on most people's minds as they struggle to understand it's source. I am sure there is also a term used to define our current crop of teenagers and their respective generation with some kind of letter, like Generation A or Generation B. I'll go with Generation Give Me What I Want or I'll Sic Social Services On You. But, my point here is that it isn't too difficult to figure out why our youth are so impatient and expect privilege without responsibility or hard work.
It seems to me that the American Dream has been perverted into the American Fantasy. Less accountability, more belongings, more pleasure and yes... more entitlement.
So, how does this apply to relationships? How realistic are most people's expectations of their spouses or their marriages? How tolerant are we really when it comes to the seasons of our lives and how they interact with those of our loved ones?
The reality is that the divorce rate is ridiculous and people are terrified of marriage because their expectations are unrealistic. I think that if eyes were set on reality, the expectations wouldn't kick us in the butt. Recognizing how little we really are entitled to, how much we need to really work for what we want, and how much it really is worth it, starts with granting nature its rights to run its course.
Trying to get our relationships to spontaneously bring forth the products (produce) we think during the wrong season of life and then resenting it for not being unnaturally accommodating to our unrealistic expectations is pretty fruitless (Warning: Metaphor Overkill Now In Progress).
Needless to say, I feel that there is a time and season for all things, not just tomatoes. After all, how can we truly appreciate the sweetness this life has during seasons of plenty if we haven't accepted the bitterness of going without during seasons of drought? Now, where did I put that vanilla? I want to make some exotic cupcakes.
1 comment:
Well Said.... I may just pass that one on to Jeromy!
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